Yesterday, as I was walking home, I felt hungry. So I went into 7-Eleven and decided to get myself a hotdog bun. I made a mess out of myself when the chilli sauce spurted out of the bottle, and onto my hands! Thank God there was no other customer around. The guy behind the counter took out a paperbag, for me to contain the hotdog bun and he passed me some tissues. I just passed him the bun, while trying to clean myself up. He even directed me to the sink behind the counter, meant for 7-Eleven personnel only. After I washed my hands, he told me that there's tissue above the sink. He's so sweeet right? Not to mention that he's kinda cute too. I thought I might have melted a little right there and then. Hehe. To the guy behind the counter, though you will not read this at all, but still, THANK YOU! :)

Watched 'Confessions Of A Shopaholic' with Emilia just now. I'm really trying to watch my spending now, especially since I'm gonna be jobless soon. By the way, I'm dreaming of blue eyes and cute British accent now. :P

'Slumdog Millionaire' a.k.a 'Q & A' is an awesome read. Though I took ages to finish the book, but I'm so so glad I bought it. At the beginning, it didn't seem so interesting, as compared to the movie. However, as the story progressed, I find myself being drawn into the world of Ram (that's Jamal for those who watched the movie), fascinated by the story behind each question/answer. I wonder how captivating the story will be if there was to be an exact depiction of it. (Danny Boyle changed quite a bit of the story).Hmm...

I'm happy to be reading once again.:)

I don't understand why it seems like you're throwing a temper. Maybe you had a bad day, or something bad happened to you. All I did was just try to tell you that it's not always the case, it depends on who you meet. I'm finding it hard to talk to you. Everyday, I'm struggling to love you as a person, to think good thoughts about you. I find it hard to comprehend you, and I wonder why you're still here. You criticise my country, you talk about my people like as if you don't care that I'm one of them. You find it so tough to stay in this country, you're so sick and tired of this place because you don't have good relationships with people. The ultimate for TODAY was when you said "you all asians...don't understand how foreigners feel...". Hello~ aren't you asian too? It's not that we don't understand how foreigners feel, it's just that we don't understand how foreigners LIKE YOU feel. You think it's right for our government to pay for your studies but selfish of us to bond you for a few years. Haven't you heard of "there's no free lunch."? I'm so tired of trying to scold myself, whenever I get irritated with your remarks, tired of feeling like a hypocrite, smiling at you, keeping mum when I obviously feel like shooting back at all your remarks about us. I don't want to talk about this because we can go on all day and God knows what sort of sharp comments I will retort you with. When that happens, oh no, you would think that we're crazy, that we're unreasonable. Tell me, if you dislike this country and her people so much, why are you still here? Pay for your bond and leave this place. Save yourself the unhappiness, the self-pitying and PLEASE, let the angel and devil in my head rest. They're exhausted from trying to outdo each other. Also, take time to think about why you're feeling this way. Haven't you thought of the fact that your personality may be the key issue? Pray for enlightment. please. I'm glad I'm leaving this office, and YES, that means I'm glad I'm leaving you behind too...

And so, finally, I've tendered my resignation, after months of complaining and praying and thinking. Took me so long to pluck up the courage to enter Keith's (my boss) office to hand him the letter. All I managed to say was, " Sorry." "Eh. I will serve the one month notice". He was totally expressionless, I couldn't make out what he was thinking. I hope he's taking it well and will not give me hell during my last one month of working here. I don't know if it's a right choice, but I know I'll be happier when I'm outta here. At least, I know I won't regret this decision.

I wonder what's going on right now. Everyone's around me is turning into a nerd. They're frantically studying, every moment of the day. Rachel's always doing her readings, and I'm so amazed by her discipline, far away in Australia, alone, and yet she can force herself to study. Emilia (my cousin), has been studying hard too. That's even more scary. She's studying day and night, to the extent of not being able to sleep. Exams' not till April for her. No clubbing, partying this week, just studying. It's like as if she's a nerd. Hahaha. If you know her, you will totally understand why I feel this way. I feel guilty after looking at both of them, and I know that I'm supposed to study hard too. Come to think about it, I've never spent days studying non-stop. I will usually rush through everything, just the day before any exams and then after that, dump everything aside. I think I spent more time sleeping during the day than studying for anything. No, correct that, it's DEFINITELY, not think. Hahaha. Oops. I should really start reading through my textbooks already. I'm gonna have exams for both VSC and school in April!

Ivan's in the office now. He's the dude who shares the same office as my boss. He's his own boss. I watched as he passed by my room just now, and thought, "Oh man, I'm really gonna miss this guy when I leave.". All his funny and crazy ringtones, shouting, teasing and all. He's a really nice chap, an uncle to be exact. (He's turning 41 but so doesn't look that, and acts like a total boy!). He doesn't know about my resignation. 10 April's my last day!

Random thought...I am thinking of boots right now. I want a pair!

Today is 'Go Green Day' for the VSC, and so we went to Hort's Park for a nature walk. Woo! I didn't know that Singapore has so many jungles and it was quite cool walking on the steel bridge, from one place to another. The imaginative me had to think about what will happen to us if the bridge will to break apart in the middle of our walk. Will we fall into the jungle below? Will I be able to cling on to any pole? Will I survive? Yeah, that kinda questions. I mean, it's kinda interesting to just picture that scene and wonder what will happen next. Hee.:)

The mentioned bridge (connector)

Secretly snapped a shot of two dogs, only to find out they belong to one of my Sirs. They're so adorable!

The turnout for our squad today, with our Range instructor. :)

Then, I went jalan jalan with Liana, from Bugis to Far East, to Peninsula. I had wanted to get my brother his present, but I can't find the shop at Far East plaza! I think it closed down or something. In the end, I got myself a bag from Peninsula, for only 15 bucks. So cheap! Anyway, we had a nice chat along the way. We actually have quite a lot of things in common, and she's easy to talk to. I'm glad I decided to join her for shopping instead of going home to sleep. :D

My nice new bag. I chose it cos it's the only design that is found in only 1 shop, instead of the rest, which are found in every shop. Hope no one else has the same bag as me. Well, at least I hope I won't bump into them on the street.

I came home, to discover that Wan Hsin and Yimin are studying at Siglap and so, I went over to join them for dinner. Haven't met them for quite a while. Had nice sandwich at Coffee Club and then off to Katong side for Yimin's job interview. Didn't manage to spend enough quality time with them. Hope to do so next time, SOON!

Yimin, enjoying her baked rice

Notice the difference in our size of bread? Hahaha!
Trying to fit everyone into the photo, at the bus stop.

I played hockey yesterday! Not very satisfied with my own performance but I got to meet Shida! Yay! Finally! I miss you, Green Dino! Though we didn't spend a lot of time together, but I had fun. I want to meet the FATSSS again!

Then it was dinner at Plaza Singapura with Aditya and the Indian scholars, Sritam and Pratik. Rather interesting to catch up and get to know more about the boys. I'm glad the two of them are settling well in Singapore and our education system. Oh! Aditya sent me home after that. I'm quite amazed by him, I must say, for he was such a gentleman, offering to come to get me when I reached Plaza Singapura (I was late due to hockey), when he could have just asked me to go and find them. Great, I'm learning more about people each day and I'm happy for myself.:)

I had a fruitful weekend! Satisfied!

On days when I'm feeling alone, I would always be reminded of you...
of how you would sms me after school everyday, asking about my day...
those days, I would think you're annoying and complain each time i receive your sms...
then, you were asked to leave the country because of permit issues...
it was then I realised, you meant something to me...
a friend, even though we haven't met before, but a friend nonetheless...

I wish you would visit here someday and I can meet the real you...
then again, maybe what is known to me now, is the best for me...

Wow...I've not updated for so long! I didn't even know my blogskin is so gone. Haha. So, I've changed it to a much simpler and plain one. :)

Hmm. I think I've forgotten how to blog now, a bit rusty. Oh! There's something I want to say though. I'm done with reading Pastor Larry's book - " I never asked to be a pastor's kid " ! It's an awesome read. I feel so inspired after reading it, so amazed with what God has done in Pastor's life, and how he has faithfully followed God's plan to carry out his duties. Thank God he listened to the holy spirit, or else I wouldn't have found my spiritual family. I want to be a faithful child of God, with senseless faith, just believing in Him to guide me in my path, to do His will.

Last week, I failed my shooting test. I was so sad that I almost cried on the spot. I held in my tears, because I didn't want to cry in front of my squadmates. Plus, how can someone who wants to be a POLICE OFFICER cries just because she failed a test?! I was devestated, I have never failed anything in my training so far, and I daresay that I've been doing well. So, naturally, my ego was bruisd. However, I was immediately reminded of the book and I began to let go, realising that God has a reason for what He does. I began to thank God for letting me fail, for allowing this failed attempt to humble me. I trust that if it's meant to be, it's will happen. I was filled with peace after that. I was no longer sad. At the same time, one of my squadmate was telling us about her PDT, how she has gone for so many tests, yet she is still called back to retrain. She felt quite bad about it. Again, I start to realise that my situation's not that bad after all. I failed only once, but she has spent a few months retraining, but still has yet to clear the PDT test. Of course, I'm not trying to use her example to make myself feel better, but I felt that was a slap in my face, to make me stop complaining and wallow in my own misery.

A lesson learnt. :)